|
|
Deference
vs.
Rudeness
Website Design by Digital Life Productions
For more on this quaility...
- visit "Just for Kids"
- see the Resource list
- visit www.characterfirst.com
- visit "Just for Kids"
- see the Resource list
- visit www.characterfirst.com
Concept by Character First
Parents - Click here for tips on encouraging your children to develop the character quality this month.
Check out the Just for Kids pages for a nature analogy and a historical lesson.
I will:
Talk about Deference
President William McKinley served the United
States as president from 1897 to 1901. At one
point, he was trying to choose between two
equally qualified men for a certain diplomatic
post.
As he weighed the qualifications of the two men, he recalled seeing one of the men several years before seated at the front of streetcar in which McKinley was seated at the back.
An elderly woman loaded with heavy packages struggled to get onto the streetcar. McKinley recalled seeing the man raise his newspaper to pretend he didn't see the woman, instead of giving her his seat. McKinley himself got up from the back and offered the woman his seat.
Because McKinley knew the extreme importance of deference to the tastes of another culture in the diplomatic service, he gave the post to the other man.
The man who lost the post never knew how an early display of poor character cost him a position he cherished.
As he weighed the qualifications of the two men, he recalled seeing one of the men several years before seated at the front of streetcar in which McKinley was seated at the back.
An elderly woman loaded with heavy packages struggled to get onto the streetcar. McKinley recalled seeing the man raise his newspaper to pretend he didn't see the woman, instead of giving her his seat. McKinley himself got up from the back and offered the woman his seat.
Because McKinley knew the extreme importance of deference to the tastes of another culture in the diplomatic service, he gave the post to the other man.
The man who lost the post never knew how an early display of poor character cost him a position he cherished.
"America's freedom was
born out of the power of
character -even with a lack
of ability [in war].
"Every action in company ought
to be with some sign of respect
to those present."
1.
2.
3.
4.
"Making my own schedule and priorities secondary to the
wishes of those I serve."
George Washington
5.
"Deference is the spirit of teamwork!"
"While deference yields in matters of
preference, it remains firm in matters of
truth."
Deference is at the heart of good
manners. The root Latin word meant to
"remove something." Deference removes
the barriers put up by fighting for our
personal preferences, clinging to our
rights, and promoting ourselves first. It
promotes harmony in group settings.
A person with deference does not compromise right action or good character, but does respect the tastes of others over his own.
A person with a deferential attitude is observant of those around him, recognizing their tastes and making efforts to accommodate them. He seeks to view situations with a perspective bigger than his own.
A person with deference does not compromise right action or good character, but does respect the tastes of others over his own.
A person with a deferential attitude is observant of those around him, recognizing their tastes and making efforts to accommodate them. He seeks to view situations with a perspective bigger than his own.
What is Deference?
noticing a colleague on the
phone nearby and lowering
your voice or moving
further away to continue
your own conversation.
Wiping off the counter top in a lavatory so that it is dry for the next person.
Wearing modest clothing so you won't offend others.
Giving the last piece of cake to another.
Letting an argument go, rather than trying to have the last word.
Wiping off the counter top in a lavatory so that it is dry for the next person.
Wearing modest clothing so you won't offend others.
Giving the last piece of cake to another.
Letting an argument go, rather than trying to have the last word.
The Rewards of Deference
Preference vs. Deference
Blocks to the harmony produced by deference!
Refusing to let go of our habitual way of doing things.
Being 'self-absorbed,' ignoring the expressed tastes of others.
Being so interested in our personal rights and agendas that we ignore the 'bigger picture.'
Being confident that our own way of doing things is the best.
Being 'self-absorbed,' ignoring the expressed tastes of others.
Being so interested in our personal rights and agendas that we ignore the 'bigger picture.'
Being confident that our own way of doing things is the best.